Wednesday 14 September 2011

5 questions after a rubbish morning...

I'm in a grumpy mood.  DH is away on business so its just me, and lets just say that my best laid plans for the organised harmonious school run did not go as hoped.  We were indeed late. In fact I was forced to park illegally close to the zebra crossing in order to avoid being "shut door late" - which involves you having to go to the office to drop them off, and receiving a *dum dum duuuummmmm* late mark.  And it was not my fault.  So, after calming down by eating some left over Very Hungry Caterpillar cake and skyping my Mummy, here are a few rhetorical questions (unless my comment thing below is fixed, in which case feel free to answer them) that occurred to be this morning...

1.  Is it okay that neither of my children have gone to school looking clean, bright or shiny on school photo day?  K seems to be wearing the oldest, dirtiest summer dress she owns, while E is in a third hand school polo shirt and a dirty cardigan.  I tried to get both of them to change - but they were both adamant they looked great and I didn't have the energy to fight anymore, plus we'd only have been even later.

2. How many times do I need to state that left over breakfast is not recyclable and therefore goes in the FRONT bin.  Really - its not that hard.  What are they going to remake your bacon rinds into? A nice hat? Some stylish stationary? Front bin, front bin...

3. Why does K think that 10 minutes before we are due to leave the house is a good time to put on her tap shoes and practice here shuffle steps. Not now! Do you want me to throw them in the bin? Front bin, front bin...

4. What was I thinking when I bought this necklace?  Did I forget who I was and suddenly think my life had transformed into a woman from an advert for Waitrose? G thinks its another birthday present: "Look mummy's bought me this entertaining thing to pull off her neck while she carries me.  And its even full of conveniently chock-sized beads!" Try getting a baby in a hip sling when they are gripping your beads like a jewelry thief hanging onto the hearty thingy in Titanic...



5. Is it okay to shout at a 5 year old who, 1 minute before you are supposed to be leaving, decides they need to visit the facilities for a number two? Come on - you've had all morning to do that! I was brushing my teeth! Have you wiped properly? Have you washed your hands? Have you washed your hands properly?  No I don't want to smell them to see that they smell of soap - GET IN THE CAR!

Its a good thing we live in a detached house.  I think if we had a party wall social services would have been round today.  Now where is the last piece of cake...

2 comments:

  1. Sounds like a normal morning in the McAllister household... love having to sign A in and be tutted by the school secretary. She even told me I should get out of bed earlier once!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Forget the necklace, how tiny is your waist! Great photo, I think you'd look good in a waitrose ad!

    ReplyDelete